On the other hand, boys had no feelings for girls and were crazy for other boys until they had that one thought of being gay. OCD makes the individual feel that they can't trust their own mind. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. CBT is a form of therapy that enables you to recognize and alter harmful thought and behavior patterns. There are some notable differences between the two. Reviews: 90% of readers found this page helpful, Address: Apt. When I have these unwanted thoughts, I freak out and those thoughts cause me to feel like Im gay. All types of OCD include obsessions and compulsions. Many dudes experience it. Typical exposures for HOCD fears may involve looking at triggering materials, listening to triggering music, and being around triggering people (all without doing compulsions of course!). All in all, you can figure it out through online sources as well. They may also try to compulsively engage in activities that counter the obsessions, such as straight men who overcompensate by watching hetero porn or avoiding all contact with members of the same sex. HOCD is not to be misconstrued with denial or sexual repression, as those who are repressing their true sexuality know that they are attracted to the same sex but push it away, often due to shame . AmI pretending its not happening? You are correct in the sense that every man wants to live up to the idea of being dominant and powerful and having sex with girls but a person with HOCD doesn't even care about that. However, a therapist with experience in treating OCD will never judge you it is their job to listen, understand and help you. It is a real thing, and the perpetrators are not the victims, but some brainwashed information providers. 01 Sexual Orientation OCD (previously called Homosexual OCD or HOCD) is a subset in which sufferers constantly question their sexuality. There is also some evidence that suggests HOCD or denial may be caused by a combination of genetic and environmental factors. Unlessyourebisexual,youwontfeel any sexualorromanticattractiontotheoppositesexifyouretrulyhomosexual. Your true sexuality just wouldn't let you. They would never do that to me. They would deny any evidence to the contrary, no matter how strong it may be. Accept that sexuality is natural and that gay feelings are normal and not a bad thing. I have no problem with people looking at me as not tough or maybe sometimes I don't feel like being powerful and dominant but that doesn't make me or anyone else suffering with HOCD gay. What do you know about the people who suffered HOCD? Anna Freud has referred to denial as a defense mechanism involving the refusal to accept reality and thus blocking external events from awareness. Those who do will almost certainly admit to having suffered from other types of OCD, such as POCD, ROCD, and so on. There are 3 types of denial. And compared to you I never felt that way about boys when I was younger. I decided that I wanted to help people with OCD, so I became an OCD therapist, and eventually, a clinical supervisor. Difference between DNA Transcription and DNA replication, self-doubt of an individual regarding their sexual preference and identify, avoiding contact with people that have previously identified themselves as gay/lesbians/bisexual, unwanted sexual thoughts about people of the same sex, excessive fear of being identified as homosexual, Fully aware of the condition but denying about it, Trying to minimise the effects of the situation instead of accepting it, Blaming others/ external elements for the situation, Refusing to talk about your homosexuality, Ignoring the concerns and advice of family and loved ones, When confronted about your orientation, denying outright about lt, Projecting it as a problem and blaming others for it, www.choosingtherapy.com/hocd/#causes-triggers-of-sexual-orientation-ocd, www.simplypsychology.org/defense-mechanisms.html, www.apcbham.org/2019/10/01/denial-why-it-happens-and-how-to-overcome-it/, www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/internalized-homophobia. What is the distinction between homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (HOCD) and denial or being in the closet? These include having a family history of OCD or anxiety, being under a lot of stress, or have experienced trauma or abuse. The best thing to do for this is seek an OCD specialists. Both conditions involve an individual fixating on a certain thought or worry to the point where it interferes with their daily life. Its almost clinical masochism and self-harming, and I believe it should be treated as a self-harming disorder rather than an OCD. For this reason, many people misunderstand it to be "repressed" homosexuality. Here are some tips: There are a lot of similarities between HOCD and denial, which can make it difficult to tell the two apart. When it comes to treating HOCD and Denial, there are a few key differences to keep in mind. Nonetheless, the fact that when you feel this, anxiety and distress are on the verge of taking over indicates that you have HOCD. Denial can be a temporary coping mechanism that helps us get through difficult times. r/HOCD. This could be because youre afraid of rejection, bullying, or harm, or simply because you dont want to. Which is vice versa of how an HOCD sufferer feels. Copyright 2022 MantraCare Corporation | All Rights Reserved. Im also curious about what sorts of rules you live by? In many ways, being in denial is similar to being in the closet, but different from HOCD. Sometimes because a woman doesnt seem to turn on by women and men dont seem to turn on by men. How can you use these skills to bridge through the less positive days. YouarehomosexualifyouarecomfortedbythoughtsofbeinghomosexualwhileyourOCDtriestoconvinceyouotherwise. Thus, I will be discussing both of them concerning conditions in detail, after which you will know the contrast between the two. Unwanted thoughts also occur in this state. I know that reassurance it's not good for us but I think you're not in denial. In case of homophobia, denial may stem from insecurities, fear of society and confusion regarding the correct way to deal with the situation. Its perfectly normal and healthy to have doubts about your sexuality. Many dudes experience it. This can be an effective treatment for patients who can identify their negative thoughts and work to change them. Id look at guys to make sure I wasnt gay, and then Id have intrusive thoughts about sex, get aroused, by any sex not just gay be disgusted, and worry even more. Those are both terrible fears to have. This in due course of time can proceed into lead to problems in social and personal life. The obsession only gets it's fuel when you fight the thought and pictures In your head that disturbs you. In this article, we will learn about what alone these terms are, the similarities and differences between HOCD And Denial. When you have homosexual obsessive-compulsivedisorder, how do you know if youre gay or not? This is called the state of denial or being in the closet. How do you tolerate distress/anxiety? Obsessions are unwanted and intrusive thoughts, feelings, urges and doubts, while compulsions are repetitive physical or mental actions performed in an attempt to relieve distress and anxiety. ROCD2 - Constant focus on a relationship or loss of it. There is a lot of overlap between OCD and bulimia, and many experts believe that the two disorders are linked. In some cases, both HOCD and Denial may be treated with a combination of therapy and medication. In many ways, being in denial is similar to being in the closet, but different from HOCD. Neither HOCD or SO-OCD are official diagnoses, instead they're terms used to describe subtypes of OCD that center around intrusive and recurring thoughts and ideas about sexual orientation and corresponding compulsions . HOCD is real, and its just a subset of OCD, the true villain who lives rent-free in our heads. That associated with the fear of being rejected by society, having watched a homosexual individual get bullied or teased or having failed relationships/ bad experiences with people of the opposite sex can act as triggers to the condition. The more you agree with them the more you kill the obsessive part of it. Gays are hiding because they are afraid of being rejected. HOCD has been around for a long time and, to those in the know, is an established and well-understood sub-type of OCD. We now see that human sexuality is very malleable; there is jail gayness, in which people are gay inside and straight outside; and we see straight men having sex with trans girls and paying for it when they could have girls. That thought haunts them every day and is always with them. Our brains can be vexing in this way. It is different nowadays. Symptoms manifest differently for each sufferer. But the difference between you and me is that you would be selectively attended to members of the same sex to check how you are doing. But somewhere it is believed too. Most of us have heard the term in denial used before, but what does it mean? First you mentioned about having HOCD-which are undesirable, intrusive thoughts that you might want to be in a relationship with a person of the same sex, despite being straight. The problem with HOCD is that you cannot stop questioning it. It was really sweet of you to even read my post. One day when my thoughts come up, Im able to resist them and they dont affect me. Sufferers may exhibit intrusive images of homosexual behavior that lead to compulsive checking. Avoiding people of your same gender due to anxiety or unwanted fears that you might be gay. Sorry for the rant. Many people with OCD that weren't being treated for it crossed my path and weren't getting better. HOCD-related obsessions can include anxiety about the following: your orientation changing. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Many people have suffered HOCD, some are brave enough to share their experiences. What are some self-soothing activities you engage in? It is not intended to be and should not be interpreted as medical advice or a diagnosis of any health or fitness problem, condition or disease; or a recommendation for a specific test, doctor, care provider, procedure, treatment plan, product, or course of action. Don't hesitate to ask for help from loved ones. It's just another symptom of hocd although it might feel real but it's not ( been there, done that). A form of OCD known as homosexual obsessive-compulsive disorder (HOCD) is characterized by recurrent, unwelcome worries about ones sexual orientation. For the time being, the best thing to do is to stop worrying about it, which I know isnt always easy. Keara E. Valentine, Psy.D., is a postdoctoral fellow at Stanford University School of Medicine in the OCD and Related Disorders Track, where she specializes in the assessment and treatment of OCD and related disorders. The best thing to do for this is seek an OCD specialists. A mental health expert can support you and help you understand and control your thoughts and feelings if you are having persistent and unwelcome doubts about your sexual orientation. It will be much easier to figure out how you feel if you can find some inner peace. My experience as a crisis clinician allowed me to treat adolescents and children, while spending additional time updating and educating their parents. Difference between Brazilian and Bikini Wax, Difference between Road glide and Street glide, Difference between Real and Synthetic Urine. They continue to deny even when the evidence is staring them in the face. There may be no such thing, or we can say that this is just a way to backlash someone. They'd lost everything by this stage. I still have LOTS of feelings for boys. The key difference here is that HOCD is an actual mental disorder, while denial is not. They feel really similar even though I know they are very different. As hard as that sounds that's the only way out. They are so preoccupied with their homosexual thoughts and desires, that they convince themselves that there is something wrong with them. Maybe, youreoverthinkingit. Interruptive thoughts exacerbate the anxiety. Its a form of homophobia, but its also a mental illness, and you should never be mean to people who are mentally ill. On the other hand, people who conceal their sexual identities are referred to as closeted or as being in the closet. Your concerns about being gay may be causing you to focus on gay sex. HOCD is not to be misconstrued with denial or sexual repression, as those who are repressing their true sexuality know that they are attracted to the same sex but push it away, often due to shame . The same is true the other way if someone has only been interested in partners of the opposite sex and they obsess about the same sex. When this occurs, the person with OCD often sees this as further evidence that they have been in denial all along. Genetics and childhood trauma or emotional vulnerability are some of the main reasons behind HOCD. Those are both terrible fears to have. Log In Sign Up. "Well, duh!". Couldn't repair the damage. When something is too difficult to accept or goes against ones ideas or ideals, denial is a coping method that entails rejecting or blotting it out. The Content on this Site is presented in a summary fashion, and is intended to be used for educational and entertainment purposes only. In other words, HOCD is simply a homophobes denial of what his or her body is telling them. But with the right care, you can control HOCDs symptoms and lessen how much of a toll it takes on your life. 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